baby led weaning · childhood · Children · The Twin Life

Giving up of the Dummy

Dummy, pacifier, binky, or what we called it, dubba. This isn’t a post about why they are good or bad or evil or the best thing you could ever do for your sanity. Let me just say, I never expected MY children to have one, but they did. No biggie, the world didn’t end.  But the hardest part was figuring out a way to get rid of them.

A photo posted by Beth van Hulst (@hellovanhulst) on May 28, 2013 at 10:41pm PDT

//platform.instagram.com/en_US/embeds.jsOur boys used their dummies mostly as night, to help soothe them to sleep. Then, without fail, at least two or three times a night, they would wake  up frantically crying out because they had lost it in their bed or on the floor, or sometimes on the other side of their bedroom.  We would go in half-asleep, on our hands and knees, searching their blankets, under their heads, under their cots, stuck in between their cots and the wall, search through their merino sleep bags, in their pajamas, under their mattress.. and finally if all hope was lost, give them their backup dummy from the cupboard. Then, again, without fail, it would start all over again 2 hours later and then again with the other boy. You get the idea. Eventually, while we tried to keep the dubba usage confined to the bedroom, Hendrik would somehow sneak his out of the room. We also had times, travelling especially, that we would have the dubbas clipped to their clothes. And god forbid we forget them somewhere! We learned that the hard way.

  A photo posted by Beth van Hulst (@hellovanhulst) on Nov 9, 2014 at 4:35pm PST

 

//platform.instagram.com/en_US/embeds.js

So, we were ready to give the old dummy the boot!

What we did took about one day for it to sink in for Willem and two or three days for Hendrik, who was way more attached to his ever-present purple dummy.

All we did… We wrapped them up as gifts for “other babies” that need them.

Let me explain.

When the boys were old enough to understand the concept of sharing and helping, the three of us would clean out their closet every so often and find clothes that didn’t fit them anymore. I would tell them that there might be a younger baby who would like to wear it. This eventually worked with toys, but starting with clothes was an easy way to get it in their minds that these material things, most of which were given to us and hand-me-downs, were best used by giving them to someone else.

After a while, they would come to me with clothes or even with their favourite toys (some of which we couldn’t get rid of) saying, “I want to give this to a baby.” It was really sweet actually, but because they understood that, we used the same principal with their dummies.

Of course, we couldn’t actually GIVE them to other babies, but I couldn’t tell them that. So, as a family we talked about giving them to a baby that might need them. All four of us wrapped the dummies up as little presents writing on them, To Baby, From Henk & Willem. Willem decided to put some ribbon on his.

How to get rid of the dummy - hellovanhulst.com

It was a bit heartbreaking and one of those moments that you could see their brains strangely beginning to understand loss. But they were pretty good about it.

The first night, they would wake up and we would have to go in and remind them that they were good, brave boys for letting other babies have their dubbas. After one night, Willem was quite ok with it. But Hendrik did struggle for a couple nights and there was a few times I was ready to give it back to him, but we held our ground and stuck to our stories, and voila!

Dubbas are done and dusted!

x

Giving Up the Dummy, The twin life - hellovanhulst.com

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